break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
