? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
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