Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
