Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
