i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
