Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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