We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
