It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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