Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
