You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
