if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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