We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
