JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
