Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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