This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I did not marry a roomba.
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