Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
