At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
We are all done wearing pants today
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
