so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
