I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
i came on her dog
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize