i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
