white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
