i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
