glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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