At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
