omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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