uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
ugly people sure do ruin things
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize