just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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