I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
