is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Randomize
