Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
