out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
