Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
