shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize