Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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