I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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