We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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