That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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