There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
