i would punch a child for taco bell
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
