Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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