I forgot how hot balto sounded
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize