wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
I wear drunk well.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize