something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
