my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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