I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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