woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
areolas are like halos for boobs.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
