She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
vagina is talking i cant
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
