Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
