Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Randomize