just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize