he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
