hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
